.jpg)
Yes, yes, I know,
I know—it’s a scythe I’m holding, not a sickle. One of my New Year’s
resolutions for 2013 is to get Sparky to check the facts and the spelling in
his speech balloons a little more carefully. Another one is to get him to do a
full diagnostic and tune-up on CyberSparky. When we asked Sparky’s aforementioned
robot double for a few insights on what lay in store for us in the year ahead, green
smoke poured out of its Predictatron module, and it began slaloming around the
room, moaning “Danger, Will Robinson! Danger!” like something out of Lost in
Space. After fifteen minutes of this, it started screeching “You know too
much to live, Van Helsing!” like Renfield from the Bela Lugosi version of Dracula,
transitioned into a couple of choruses of “I’m An Old Cowhand”, spun around
three times, and keeled over.
The long and
short of this is that there are no bold predictions for this year, which is
probably just as well. There wouldn’t have been any funds for them in the new
fiscal cliff bill anyway. Still, we don’t want to leave you completely
empty-handed on this, the 100th anniversary of the inauguration of parcel post,
so here’s a little tidbit we found gathering mildew in a damp, forgotten corner
of the Fortress of Funitude. For all of you who may be in the throes of
post-Christmas letdown, or have a touch of the “who was that kissing my date at
midnight on New Year’s Eve?” blues, “How Not To Do It #4” will help you get
back on an even psychological keel…in theory, at least.
If not, well…there’s
always 2014 to look forward to.
Uncle Fun
No comments:
Post a Comment