Hello, all
you celebrity hunters out there:
If you’re looking for your cheap fix of
pointless fame today, you’ve come to the right place. Forget all that hoo-ha
about Avril Whats-her-name and Nickel Boy, because you are in the presence of
true luminaries here at Uncle Fun and Sparky Land. It has come to our
attention, thanks to almost a full minute of boredom-induced web-surfing by our
friend and host Mr. Cousins, that we show up first—and second (!)—in a Google
image search of the phrase “Corporal Klinger Action Figure”.
It makes a fellow proud and humble, in the
way that only a completely meaningless distinction like this can. Now that we’re
true internet stars, whose every thought, word and deed is constantly on the
verge of going viral faster than a sneezing Lolcat, we’d better self-promote
like the true children of celebrity whoredom we’ve become, and link you to the posting that made us the place of all places that the world’ turns to for images of plastic toy replicas of cross-dressing fictional Korean War soldiers.
And, just in case you think we’re a bunch
of one-hit wonders, we also turn up first in a Google image search of the
phrase “Bikegang Amadeus Mozart”.
Hardly surprising, really. It’s this sort
of thing that has made us the leader in whatever field we’ve been the leader
in, for however long we’ve been the leader in it.
Not only that, but dear old Bikegang
Amadeus Mozart (can you ever get enough of seeing that name repeated,
World of the Internet?) is not alone among chart-toppers in the posting he
appears in. (Click here for more shameless self-promotion on our part.) The
image below turns up first when you google “Debussy Dawg”.
All this from a posting that went up last
June. Yes, Mr. and Mrs. Internet, we’ve been a double-platinum Number-One-with-a-Bullet
for over a year. To celebrate both this and the sesquicentennial of
Debussy’s birth (let’s all pause for a rousing chorus of “Happy Birthday” in a
pentatonic scale), we’re giving you the first chance in a decade to hear one of
a series of radio pieces The Cousins Lad did when he still had a smattering of
culture. Click here for the true (and probably toned-down) story of one of Claude Debussy’s greatest flops.
That’s right—“flops”. We’re not letting
him ride on our coattails with any of his big-name toe-tappers like Afternoon
of a Faun or The Girl With the Flaxen Hair. If you’re a Debussy buff,
you know Jeux anyway; if not, google it. Either way, the story behind Jeux
(Click here, already! Click here!) will leave you with a mental picture that
beats anything Google can throw your way.
Not that we won’t try to top it, of
course. We have a reputation to uphold, you know.
Uncle Fun
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